I think I need a support group….
….for parents who do NOT plan to buy their pre-teen children cell phones. Is there a support group for those parents? Because I could sure use some support.
Here is a conversation we routinely have at our house --
Big (as in "Big Sister"): When are you guys ever going to get me my own phone?
Me: Why do you need a phone?
Big: So I can text my friends.
Me: You can already do that with your iPod.
Big: Yeah, but (Friend A) is getting an iPhone 6 and (Friend B) is getting the new Samsung 6 and (Friend C) is getting a new iPhone 5s for her TENTH birthday.
Me: Well, we're not going to make that choice for our family. We don't think children need to have that much responsibility and access to the internet all the time.
Big: But MOM…..even the TRAILER PARK KIDS have smart phones already!
Me: Doesn't sound like a very good use of limited resources to me.
(end scene)
Seriously, if I had a nickel for every time we have had a similar conversation I would have enough money to by Apple.
Why do children need phones at all? And for sure why does a child need a SMART phone? I didn't get a smart phone until 2014 and before that I got my first cell phone at age 31.
I realize this is a different era we are living in, where technology is king, but I don't get the rationale for kids needing phones. I've heard some parents argue that they want to have access to their kids at all times. "What if there's an emergency at school?" they argue. Yes…what IF there's an emergency? Since when will a child ever be in a position that they would be the lone person with a cell phone to call 9-1-1? And if there was an emergency, like a school shooting, I wouldn't want a bunch of fourth graders on their cell phones making frantic phone calls during a lockdown or an evacuation.
Personally, I think the downsides to a child having a cell phone far outweigh the benefits. Distraction in school, cyberbullying, having their expensive phone lost/broken/stolen, or becoming obsessed with social media are all real concerns. Plus, I don't want my child thinking that she always has to have the latest and greatest technology to keep up with the "rich" or "popular" kids at school. I can already envision the begging/whining that will ensue every time a new version of phones is released. Our plan has been and continues to be age 14 as the age for first cell phone and even then there will be some protections in place, like a "bedtime" for the phone and monitoring of texts/social media posts.
The crazy thing is that I feel very alone in these feelings. My husband and I must be in some very silent minority because I rarely see or hear evidence of parents making their child wait past elementary to receive their first phone.
I would love to find a support group of like-minded parents.
Here is a conversation we routinely have at our house --
Big (as in "Big Sister"): When are you guys ever going to get me my own phone?
Me: Why do you need a phone?
Big: So I can text my friends.
Me: You can already do that with your iPod.
Big: Yeah, but (Friend A) is getting an iPhone 6 and (Friend B) is getting the new Samsung 6 and (Friend C) is getting a new iPhone 5s for her TENTH birthday.
Me: Well, we're not going to make that choice for our family. We don't think children need to have that much responsibility and access to the internet all the time.
Big: But MOM…..even the TRAILER PARK KIDS have smart phones already!
Me: Doesn't sound like a very good use of limited resources to me.
(end scene)
Seriously, if I had a nickel for every time we have had a similar conversation I would have enough money to by Apple.
Why do children need phones at all? And for sure why does a child need a SMART phone? I didn't get a smart phone until 2014 and before that I got my first cell phone at age 31.
I realize this is a different era we are living in, where technology is king, but I don't get the rationale for kids needing phones. I've heard some parents argue that they want to have access to their kids at all times. "What if there's an emergency at school?" they argue. Yes…what IF there's an emergency? Since when will a child ever be in a position that they would be the lone person with a cell phone to call 9-1-1? And if there was an emergency, like a school shooting, I wouldn't want a bunch of fourth graders on their cell phones making frantic phone calls during a lockdown or an evacuation.
Personally, I think the downsides to a child having a cell phone far outweigh the benefits. Distraction in school, cyberbullying, having their expensive phone lost/broken/stolen, or becoming obsessed with social media are all real concerns. Plus, I don't want my child thinking that she always has to have the latest and greatest technology to keep up with the "rich" or "popular" kids at school. I can already envision the begging/whining that will ensue every time a new version of phones is released. Our plan has been and continues to be age 14 as the age for first cell phone and even then there will be some protections in place, like a "bedtime" for the phone and monitoring of texts/social media posts.
The crazy thing is that I feel very alone in these feelings. My husband and I must be in some very silent minority because I rarely see or hear evidence of parents making their child wait past elementary to receive their first phone.
I would love to find a support group of like-minded parents.
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